11 January 2011

Things Private Snuffy did in Iraq

If you or anybody you know is getting deployed, here's some useful things Private Snuffy did when we were in Iraq to help pass the time.~ CI Roller Dude




14 Things Private Snuffy Taught Me in Iraq!


1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Humvee With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing vehicles.... See If They Slow Down.

2. In the PX, Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice!

3. Every Time your boss ask You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that?"

4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker in the TOC For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

5. In the PX, In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana.

6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go to eat in the Mess Hall, with a serious face.

8. While walking around Sergeant Majors, whistel tunes from Disney movies.

9. While watching AFN TV, Sing Along At The Opera

10. Five Days before it’s time to rotate home, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend The Party Because You have a headache.

11. In the PX , When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

12. When Leaving the Mess Hall, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

13. Tell Your fellow soldiers, Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity


14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS In the PX, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.

8 comments:

Coffeypot said...

I try to observe most of them, but i think I am too far gone for any help.

suz said...

I'm ordering PFC to bookmark you!

Anonymous said...

1. Sounds like Skippy's stuff.
2. Skippy is a seriously deranged individual.
3. Never served with anyone that clever.
V/R Jwest

Riley Carson said...

Oh.. my... GAWD!

Being a completely serious officer that I am, I would never encourage and/or participate in anything like that... but...

I've seen it done and it's hilarious.

I especially enjoyed the Private Snuffy's that talked to their weapon and pet it.

CI-Roller Dude said...

CP,
You'd been the guy in the Navy doing shit like this in your day.

Suz, I should have a disclaimer..."only E-4's and above should read my blog."

Mr West, I had an ongoing story I started in Bosnia on Private Snuffy...

RC, You need humor to survive in war. Like when the mortar rounds miss you and you laugh at the insurgents....

Hogdayafternoon said...

Excellent. Loved the Disney tunes. Whenever i was called in, from off duty, to an urgent spontaneous firearms incident I'd tend to have Disney tunes playing in my car. I found I arrived in a better frame of mind than with Metallica. Although once, one senior dude did raise his eyebrows a touch when I breezed up to the RVP, blue strobes blinking and with "Zippety Doo Dah" emanating from my vehicle. Some people just don't get it :)

Wrexie said...

Hehee. Combat comics are the bestest...

Momma Fargo said...

Now that's some funny shit! Loved it! Between you and Coffey...I have peed my pants with laughter.