29 October 2008
The BADDDD LT...cont...
From the Soldier side: Sorry I've been so busy...training a new cop at work and all. Good part of that is that he's pretty bright. In the past, I've had a few who were dumber than a box of rocks.
Well, to get back to that story of the crappy LT we had in Baghdad...As I was stuck in the office on light duty, I had to look at her everyday. I think I was able to give her that "look" that I might kill someone if they messed with me....I'm not really sure if that's what got her to stop buggin' me or what.
...but she still wanted to go "outside the wire" on a mission or two. Great...all we needed was for a brand new officer to go out and try to take over the mission. So, I had talked to the company commander, and our "mission control" person. They agreed with me, that if she was going to go out, she was not going to be in charge...of anything. She would just be a passenger.
So, I set up a date. I'd have her ride in the back seat of the last humvee in the convoy...with no chance to talk on the radio or to be able to do anything else to screw things up.
I explained it to her one morning...."Mam, I convinced the CO to let you go in a mission. You know that you're very important and they can't afford to loose you, or have you captured...or anything like that...."
She was eating my BS up. She was so excited to be able to go. But I was still worried that she'd hurt someone. The normal procedure for going on a convoy was:
1.) you had to be put on the convoy manifest
2.) it had to be approved etc
3.) before any convoy, you had to go through the training on our procedures for things like getting killed and all.
4.) make sure you were qualified on your weapon etc.
As the convoys drove out the gate, they would "lock and load" their weapons. In this case, I told the LT to just put a magazine in her M-16 and not put a round in the chamber. (everyone else had a round in the chamber.) I didn't trust her to not have a negligent discharge in the humvee. (I'm a good judge of people in this respect....comes from running police and army weapons ranges for so many years...I can see it in their eyes)
So, the dumbass LT got to go on a little convoy ride...just to the "Green Zone" in Baghdad...about the safest place you could go at that time. She came back and acted like she was a big ass combat vet. Then I told her: "Mam, some of these guys have done this over 150 times since they've been here. You've done it once, just to the "Green Zone" so calm down."
Then she asked where I'd been. After I told her, she learned to shut up.
She got sent home a week after that. Turns out she was "with child". That was the best day in Iraq...we had a party the day she flew out of Baghdad airport.
I'll tell you about "her" replacement in my next posting.... (if I don't see comments, I don't know if anyone is reading this crap.)